rise and shine
by catching
Summary: "The person I truly want to cherish is myself."


**title: rise and shine**

**summary: **"The person I truly want to cherish is _myself._"

**pairing: **none, suzume.

**notes: (i wrote this when the last chapter came out actually but i only just got bothered enough to post it hah) **wooooooo I'm a shizume shipper if you can't tell but this is the ending i actually wanted and so without further adieu~

**warnings: alert alert this is short and dumb**

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"I'm sorry." He is silent, dead silent and although Suzume wholeheartedly believes in the words she's about to say she feels for the beautiful man in front of her. "I can't return sensei's feelings." Suzume clenched her fists, "right now," she pretended her voice was nothing but strong. "The person I truly want to cherish is _myself._"

_No matter how much_, she thought quietly, _how late I notice, at that time I should've realised how I truly feel._

Suzume looked at the hands limp in her lap, "I'm sorry. I can not accept your feelings." She spoke again, this time reflecting on the consequences of her words, she couldn't go back now. "I'm sorry."

Shishio from beside her shook is head and chuckled quietly, "yeah. You shouldn't be, I thought it would turn out like this…" He turned to her and gave her a sad smile, "Although maybe not _exactly_ like this… I feel relieved that I finally got to say what I really wanted and the fact that you got worried and came to see me is more than enough to make me happy." His arms loosely folded and he looked up at her, their eyes met and a feeling of conclusion rang between the both of them.

"Sensei," Suzume's voice broke somewhat, "you once said that my love was closer to adoration." Her body, turned and she sat facing him, "But this was really love." Tears fell from her eyes and her chin creased, her face became a perfect picture of honesty. "No matter what people say, you are my first love." Shishio fell in love with her all over again in that moment, and as he sat gazing upon her with something akin to regret he found that he didn't have the heart to regret _her._

Suzume lowered her eyes to her lap and she found herself wondering if she was making the right decision, _I won't have my name called in that special tone of his anymore, I'll no longer be–_

She felt the hand on her head before she could register his words, "You're right."

"Hey!" Shishio's hand lay on her head and Suzume found herself crying harder, "You exaggerate a lot, don't you… It's not as if we're parting for life!" _I'll no longer be touched by these hands. _Suzume found her breath and stilled, mentally calming herself down, she looked at sensei. He wore that smile, the one he wore like armour and she wanted to hug him but she refrained. They say that if you are truly smiling your eyes will crinkle at the end, one does not only smile with their mouths… and in that moment she imagined him without the smile and she only saw sadness. "I'll see you in the new semester."

_A new semester… _she thought, _but… even if we pass each other in the hallway the sensei from back then will no longer be there. _Suzume wiped her tears with her arm and looked at her first love one last time and found that she no longer felt the gushy nervousness accompanied by her crush. "See you!" Shishio laughed before ducking down the corridor.

_There were many tears, many unsure times, many troubled moments. The fun memories were only a few but even so, those memories will shine like stardust, and continue to shine on in my heart. _Suzume watched his back as it went, _I'm happy that you were, my very _first_ memory. From now on until the end of time, you are someone that I will,_ "never forget." She whispered.

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_I'm thinking about her again… _Mamura thought, for some reason the beach reminded him of her, perhaps it was the fish? He laughed quietly, it was just like her to make him laugh when he was sad. "Mamura!" He turned, _what? _Was he hallucinating? "MAMURA!" Was she… running? The laughter bubbled up in his throat, what was she doing? Was that a dog on her shirt?

Mamura stumbled on the sand, _what? A hallucination? _She ran towards him and the two collided, lying side by side on the sand. They sat in silence huffing before Mamura sat up, he looked at her. "What about tokyo?! Didn't you go _back_?!" Suzume sat up and looked at the sea.

"I did. I went back and I had a proper talk." She turned to him and smiled, "me and sensei, we are… officially over. My heart was changing and I no longer felt the same about him." Suzume smiled, "I have you to thank Mamura, but," she frowned. "I- I took advantage of what you felt and pushed myself into _it _(she looked between them sadly) which wasn't fair to you and it wasn't fair to me. I… want to be fair to me and you're my friend Mamura." Suzume fingered her mog shirt, "I thought that I loved you, but I still don't know what love _is." _She punched him in the shoulder, "_you deserve better."_

Mamura sat frozen before looking up to the sky, he looked back at her eyes tracing over every beautiful detail. Her eyes, her hair, her all… _There is no one I deserve more…_ he thought. Mamura blinked. "I'm," he sighed, "surprised. I… thought you would pick him."

Suzume lay back down, "Me too." She looked down at her empty palms, "but I think my decision was best." She crinkled her nose, sniffing the air, "It smells so salty..."

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**fin.**


End file.
